What we 'truly' want

Earlier I asked a question: Are the things that we want truly what we want or are they what we think we want? I didn’t get any reply though, but the question still prevails We live in a society that follows a pattern, birth-completing education-getting a job-getting married-having children-death. We are made to believe that this is the key to happiness. But if this is really the case, why so many successful people are unhappy and get depressed or worse end up their lives? Doesn’t that make you question, is that really the kind of life that we are meant to live? Hi I am Shubhi, my whole life I tried to follow the template of life that society made for many of us, all that usual stuff, get a degree, get a job, settle down, start a family. I tried to stay on but I definitely failed in some cases, and these failures have always caught people’s judgement. I sat in a cab once where the driver was lecturing me when my reply to his question: Are you married? Was a big fat no. for almost our whole journey he made it clear to me why deciding not to get married is wrong. The truth which I’d not like to share with the driver who is driving me home is that I wanted to, but life did not turn out the way I planned. We split up and went our separate ways. I made a decision so painful that we both should have a better life. For that, I got judged, condemned, criticised. And yet I was sitting at the back of the cab with a total stranger lecturing me why I should get married.

But the conversation really stuck with me. If you’ve followed the Normal pattern and you truly are happy then Congratulations. But there are those who are asking deeper questions and looking for something more meaningful than living a normal life because we begin to realise that is not what life is all about, it is much more. More money. Big house, fancy car and all that stuff simply don’t cut it. Those things are great and We all are extremely grateful for it but there’s something within. What if life's not about following a pattern? What if it is not for money driven success to become happy and successful and fulfilled? What if the life that we carefully planned is not the life we’re meant to live? Since childhood, I’ve always had the feeling that I was meant to do something with my life. I didn’t know what that ‘something’ was but there was this little voice, always trying to steer me in the direction and often, I didn't listen. Sometimes, I did, but most of the time I allowed myself to listen to others because it seemed like everybody knows better than me. What I didn’t know was that if you keep ignoring that little voice you could end up in the wrong place. I learned it the hard way. It took a life-shattering event in my life to get my full attention. But no matter how many times I lost my way, it never told me: I told you so, it's just kept saying it’s okay, everything will be fine.

Here I am looking desperately for my purpose, these were questions I’ve asked many times in my life. The answers didn’t come easily. And even when they did, they didn’t come all at once. I remember reading it somewhere: Everyone was born with a gift. Your career is what you’re paid for, your calling is what you need and what you are made for. And this calling is directly connected to the gift that you have. So think, what is that something that comes easily to you that others? I have not found mine yet. But yes I love to write even when I know that I completely suck at it, but I feel that I am heard even when there’s no one to listen. I felt seen even when there was no one looking. This writeup might sound boring to a lot of people but there’s always two sides of the same coin. And I am waiting for the other side to share their thoughts.

6 comments:

Ganesh28 June 2020 at 01:30
Bitter truth 😔
Muhammad kaleem tandawala28 June 2020 at 01:37
Umdah
Ashutosh Bansal28 June 2020 at 01:59
Well written.. 😊🌸🍫
Unknown28 June 2020 at 02:14
Best 😇😇
Rajat28 June 2020 at 02:55
This was more than enough for me to read for myself.
Unknown28 June 2020 at 04:43
Amazing blog. I hope this will help a lot of people to get through their dilemma of 'what are we supposed to do with life'. Reading this gave me some sort of motivation, I hope it does the same or more to other readers. Good on you Shreya. Keep up cheers!!.

Innocence